Karalee’s Post #29
Self-doubt is a simple hyphenated two syllable word that if said quick enough escapes one’s vocal cords without so much as a hi or a good-bye and is forgotten before it can be remembered. It’s not a show stopper like the words sex, Vulcan mind-meld, Hell’s Angels or Silk’s Sunny Laine.
It’s an evil little word with a forked tongue and the ability to incapacitate one’s thinking. Self-doubt steals more than Bonnie and Clyde or the neighborhood squirrel, taking away one’s self-confidence, sleep and appetite.
Okay, the loss of appetite has a short-term benefit of weight loss, but not the recommended manner in which to maintain a healthy marriage or any other relationship.
To me self-doubt is synonymous with decapitation of one’s creativity and the ability to get words on screen, never mind completing a project and going through the rejection process in trying to get the fledgling to fly out of the nest.
Needless to say, I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment.
Last week I confessed to tightening up my timeline which is a great thing. Then, in going back and making it work in my scenes, I enjoyed re-reading and re-writing until I started questioning this and that and the next thing. How’s my pacing? My character development? Is it believable? How in the heck can I write about something I don’t know about even if I’ve researched it?
How am I going to finish on time?
How am I going to read and critique my fellow group members on time?
There is nothing more debilitating than self-doubt.
So how do I get through this?
It’s no different that having to meet a deadline at work. And those of us that are serious about being published and making an income at it must keep going. Keep producing.
Make a To Do list, go to yoga, de-stress by walking the dogs and do relaxation breathing. But most important of all, keep writing one word at a time. This adds up to paragraphs and scenes and a finished product.
And like it always does, it leads to the excitement of writing when pacing is perfect, characters are awesome and the keyboard starts smoking in the sex scene or at the climax.
That’s why we write.
Now get to it.