Why write?


Joe’s Post #24 — It’s a good question. It takes away time from watching Glee. It’s hard. Generally, pimply-faced kids make more at McDonald’s. And, at the Oscars, no one could give a hot damn who wrote what.

So why?

For me, 11 things (11 ’cause Letterman has a patent on the top 10 list, so, like Spinal Tap, I’m going to 11!)

1) Zombies can’t write and someone needs to tell their stories.

2) Every time I invent a new verb, I get a little tingle in my private parts. Verbing new words…So fun.

3) I can’t sing. I can’t dance. I can’t play the didgeridoo. It’s pretty much the creative outlet of last resort.

4) I learn so many new things that I would otherwise never think of looking up. Coke was originally green. Nagasaki was not the city the 2nd bomb was going to be dropped on. Decimation came from a Roman form of discipline. Banging your head against a wall burns 150 calories an hour. Who knew?

5) I get to be all sorts of people. Serial killers. Unicorns. Unicorn serial killers. Grief-stricken victims. Brave teenage girls. Tough-guy PIs. Wise-cracking rogues. I guess the cool thing really is I don’t get locked up for having so many personalities.

6) I can write-off my laptop.

7) I have all sorts of excuses to go to other places in the world.

8) When a scene comes together and sings, it’s a magical moment. Heroine addicts know what I’m taking about. Sex addicts, too, I should imagine.

9) I have an excuse to go to a coffee shop every day.coffee

10) Hot women will read my writing and want to meet me. (Actually, I never thought this was true until the other day.)

11) It’s what I’m meant to do. I may not be successful at it, I may never sell a bizillion books or appear on the Tonight Show, but I know it in my bones. This is my calling.

Now, I need to burn off some calories and bang my head against a wall.

Queries: 5

Rejections: 1

New Novel Ideas: 2 (I love the idea of serial killer unicorns.)

Holes in Wall: 1